ARE YOU LOOKING FOR TROUBLE?
CHANGE YOUR MIND.
When I was a kid, my uncle told me a story about changing eye-glasses. He said that if I had yellow lenses in my glasses, everything would be yellow. If I had a green tint on my glasses, everything would be green. He used this analogy to remind me that it’s the perspective through which we see things that becomes our experience.
I think you know the feeling. You are struggling with one thing, and then it seems like everything else is challenging too. It's not you or some bad luck; it's how the mind works.
YOUR MIND WILL LOOK FOR WHAT YOU TELL IT TO LOOK FOR
When I speak to audiences who are in the business of looking for trouble, like insurance companies, lawyers, and accountants, who are basically paid to look for what could go wrong, I remind them that it can fast become a double whammy of stress that can be overwhelming and ultimately spill over into our work-culture and our lives outside of work.
We need the awareness, of course, but how we work with it is what helps us reclaim agency over stress.
When I learned how to SCUBA dive, most of what we learned wasn't how to float in the water at 45' depth; it was how to respond in case your air supply failed at that depth. Most of the training was based on what to do when things go wrong. There's a difference between knowing what to do if things go wrong or being stuck in what's not working.
Our job isn't to get stuck in what could go wrong but to use that as information to prepare us in a constructive and proactive way so that we know what to do if things do go wrong. You can think of it as preventive care, which works best when our goal is to thrive.
GETTING UNSTUCK
Essentially all companies need to have some sense of awareness of what could go wrong and fail but, at the same time, instill confidence in their teams so that the culture doesn't suffer from fear and become toxic. Just like marketing is about making our customers feel safe that they can buy from us and not regret it, similarly, we need to make people feel safe that work is going to give them a positive experience.
However, it's not just the responsibility of the organization because we all affect each other as we go through our day. I'm sure you have felt the discomfort from a conversation where the person is only focused on the problem and not the possibility of how to move past it. You might have found yourself being that person, feeling that you are not being heard for your concerns. It's human of us to think that way, and instead of judging it, let's use it to help us get unstuck.
A SIMPLE TOOL
It's important to have a critical mindset. However, a growth mindset is not about just being critical or positive; it's about being critical, positively.
You might have already heard me say that the way we ask questions hijacks our attention. When we are in the business of looking for trouble, we can easily become why-notters. We ask why something is not working instead of asking how we can make it work.
So next time you find yourself looking for trouble or you and your team are stuck discussing a problem, instead of asking why it happened, which will just make for a very defensive conversation, ask what is needed to solve the problem. This way, you tell your mind what you are trying to achieve, and it will help you figure out how to get there, past the trouble.
