Perfection is Not a Strategy for Success

Let's unlock our real power.

I recently talked with a coaching client about how our work culture encourages perfection as a measure of high performance. Unfortunately, this mindset leads to a failing relationship with failure.

Social media has long promoted the “perfect life” sharing, which can be challenging for teens and adults who feel they don't measure up. The old “keeping up with the Joneses” mentality stems from 1913.

Similarly, many companies still foster a culture of competition instead of connection, even though collaboration is the key to success. Sales teams spotlight the high performer, thinking it will motivate everyone else to strive harder. It might, but not in a way that cultivates a thriving team culture.

Buying into the idea that “being perfect” is the key to high performance, respect, and success creates a toxic culture. We conceal our failures instead of learning from them, promoting actual growth. A toxic culture is one where we hide our mistakes, often to the team's detriment and the erosion of the leader's trust. Perfection is not a strategy for success. It's a ticket to burnout.

UNLOCKING OUR HUMAN ADVANTAGE  

When we equate perfection with power, we diminish our potential to perform at our best. But how can we change our mindset when raised in a culture, society, or family environment of high expectations? Nina Ahuja, MD, a contributor to Psychology Today, discusses the complex nature of perfectionist traits, which include genetics, societal norms, and parental pressure.

We all know that the school system values grades over insight, and company cultures emphasize results over process. Yet, we are entering a new era where our human advantage lies in our ability to think, engage, and act with discernment and care—a culture where we are valued for solving problems through creative thinking and constructive questioning.

With the increased speed of technology, more is not better; better is. AI can handle faster work while our job is building relationships, starting with the one we have with ourselves.

The shift is to acknowledge the interconnectedness. That our relationship with ourselves affects our relationship with others and our collective presence. That's why self-awareness is at the core of personal, professional, and organizational growth. It's the difference between self-criticism and acknowledging our feelings. When the fear of failure sets in, self-doubt stops us from trying because we've decided that we must be perfect. Even before we try, missing out on the growth of learning and this fixed mindset keeps us stuck in a cycle of feeling stuck, insecure, and more stressed.

AUTHENTICITY WINS  

Some may argue that authenticity has received a bad reputation because we've come to interpret it as “say whatever you want,” “just be you and don't care what other people think of you,” or “weird is better.” While there's some truth in that, it's not necessarily authentic. It might just be your personality seeking attention—much like perfection. Before you get defensive, hear me out. We all go through phases where we experiment with different personalities. I certainly have. And they've all contributed to who I am today. I appreciate what I have learned from all my mistaken personality expressions. The real me is, however, not about how I present myself; it's about not hiding when I'm scared, need help, or feel out of control. It's about admitting that I have doubts. Instead of masking my fears with false positivity, I pause, listen, and ask, "What do I need to know, learn, or pay attention to to feel a bit more confident?"What do you need to feel more confident, able, agile, courageous, curious, calm, focused, engaged, joyful…. whatever you want to feel—instead of chasing perfection to feel safe?

PAUSE ON THIS: 

How do you behave when you feel most awkward? What do you tell yourself when you feel most insecure? How would you like to feel when under pressure? Making a conscious choice about this can be incredibly helpful.

If you want to go further:

Reflect on your so-called failures. Write out all the lessons you learned and the changes these experiences brought to your life, leading you to this moment.